Quotes from “Hairography”

November 25, 2009 at 10:06 pm | Posted in Glee, Glee Quotes | Leave a comment
Tags: Episode 11, Glee, glee quotes, Hairography, Hairography quotes

Quotes from Episode 11, “Hairography”:

Coach Sylvester didn’t tell me to do this.

- Brittany

You think that because our students are thieves and arsonists, we’re cheaters too?

- Ms. Hitchens

This is Ohio, we have weather.

- Ms. Hitchens

Did they have Mohawks back then, like in the 20′s or whatever?

- Puck

Puck: Saw it in the book store, thought I would steal it for you. In case you change your mind and decide you want to keep it.

Quinn: That is so sweet.

Thank God for Puck, thanks to him, I’m starting to realize that what I need right now, even more than looser pants, is acceptance.

- Quinn

Terri: You don’t drink diet soda, do you? Because the phosphoric acid causes male pattern baldness.

Quinn: The baby is a girl.

Terri: Women go bald too.

Why, hello Quinn, to what do I owe the honor? I do believe this is the first time you have ever spoken to me.

- Kurt

Make-overs are like crack to me.

- Kurt

I admit I like a challenge as much as the next guy, but Rachel somehow manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time.

- Kurt

Terri: Will, what are you doing?!

Will: I’m trying to be intimate with my wife.

Terri: No, you’re trying to have sex, not intimacy! If you want intimacy, you would ask me how I’m feeling about being pregnant.

Rachel: Kurt, why did you volunteer to give me a new look?

Kurt: One, I am a sucker for make-overs. And two, you need something to distract from your horrible personality. Most of the time I find it hard to be in the same room with you, especially this one which looks like where Strawberry Shortcake and Holly Hobby come to hook up.

You’re extremely talented, Rachel. Watching you perform is amazing. But sometimes it’s hard to appreciate what a good singer you are because all I am thinking about is shoving a sock into your mouth.

- Kurt

Kurt: I happen to know for a fact that Finn is attracted to loose women.

Rachel: But Quinn is so wholesome.

Kurt: Let me put this into musical theater terms: In Grease, what did Sandy do to get Danny Zuko? She had to ditch the Poodle skirt and slap on a cat-suit. In short, she had to dress like a ho.

That car was the perfect distraction. I would get something like that for Phil if I didn’t think it would make him so happy.

- Kendra

Kendra: She needs money. I’m gonna have her babysit my kids. Five minutes alone with those little mongrels and she’ll have her tubes tied.

Terri: You’re so smart.

Kendra: You got the beauty but I got the brains and the beauty.

Quinn: Hey, what are you doing Friday?

Puck: Just the usual, standing outside the 7-11 looking depressing until someone offered to buy me beer.

It’s like cool epilepsy.

- Brittany

I’m gonna say this as nice as I possibly can, you look like a sad clown hooker.

- Finn

Kendra: What is that smell?

Quinn: Soap.

Terri: You got them to take a bath?

Kendra: What are you, an exorcist?

Looks like someone is running for Drama Queen again.

- Kurt

Hitchens: Who do you think I am?

Sue: That’s actually a very good question because I have forgotten both of your names.